Mogol Quiz Conclusion

Alright! Back in Ulaanbaatar for a day or two, just enough to get train tickets to Beijing, eat some бүүз, and finish off the Mongol Quiz!

If you recall, the question was:

What common courtesy is inexpressible in Mongol?

The answer that I was looking for was:

"please"

but in this case, your answers were so brilliantly inventive that there's heaps of points to go around. Well done, everyone. As an aside, "thank you" is only inexpressible by westerners, because transliteration is incapable of capturing the proper sounds. Here's my attempt: "buy-arrrl-[abrupt hissing sound produced in the pockets behind your teeth along with the ejection of saliva specks]-aah". My lonely planet phrasebook gives up and instead just puts the letter "l" there.

Here's how the points go out:

Rich: Actually, there's no way to say that statement, since there's no way to say please. Chinngis actually prefered not to pillage villages, but since no one bothered to ask him not to, he just figured it's what they wanted. For exhausting American humor on mongolia, you get 6 points.

Glen K.: Close. Mongolians have become accostomed to westerners extending a handshake, especially in the cities. Out in the country though, you will get a moment's confused hesitation when you offer your hand before they remember our custom. Regarding "thank you", see above. You probably have heard them say it, but you mistook it for a cat in heat in a nearby alley. 8 points.

Lizzle: Suprisingly, horse rape isn't very common. But, considering how every drunk on the streets of Tsesterleg stops you, produces a half-empty bottle of $1.50 vodka from his half-zippered pants, shakes your hand and tries to pour a shot down your throat as you back away using every mongolian word you can think of to placate his misguided generosity without having to actually touch any part of you to any part of his proffered potion-- hmm, actually theses dudes might just rape horses. Or tourists that they mistake for horses. Or, most likely, horses that they mistake for tourists. Oh, and you're right about "please". 12 points!

uslennar: Actually, you don't need to ask. It is custom, along with bland cheese, fresh sour yoghurt, dried curds, salty milk tea and dumplings, to be offered a steaming cup of wife. If you visit at the right time of the month, they serve it with a peculiar curdled ketchup.... 10 points, for giving the best LOL answer.

Dad: Can't wait to join you in the hot tub for some durhang. As for farting while milking the cows (yaks, actually), I wish someone would tell that to the yaks-- and the yak milker's older drunk brother. 7 points.

gnuheller: Interesting point. The Mongolians don't seem to clap much. As for the elbow action, they must really think I'm great considering how often I get shoved in the kidneys when trying to join a Mongolian queue (picture a bank teller in the middle of a rugby scrum). 7 points.

And the standings:

Lizzle 19.5
Lenny 19
gnuheller 18.1
Dad 16
Velma 11.5
Mom 8.5
Glen K. 8
Rich 7
Karl 6.4
Matt 5.5
Jessie 4.5
Steve 3
Jason 3
Mark 1
Guru 1
Mike -3

The points are going up, so be sure to play. Weak turnout this time around-- time to catch up in the bonus round!